I think most people can agree that the past two months have been somewhat crazy. Our lives have been flipped. Many of us are out of work, we can't see our families or our friends. Our kids are home from school (they called school off for the rest of the year in my state). I don't know about you, but my mental health during this time has been a whirlwind of emotions. Emotions that have gone from sad to confused to lazy and everything in between. I feel as though I've been on a slow decline. And you know what? That's okay right now. It's even okay for my kids to see me be frustrated, sad, or distressed.
Yep, I said it. We don't always have to put on a brave face for our kids. It's important that they know and understand we are also going through real, human emotions, just as they are. It's important for them to know that we can miss our normal lives, our friends, and family, just as much as they do.
Too often we feel like we MUST put on a "brave" face for our children, so as not to scare them. But, doesn't it make more sense to allow our kids to see that we adults have normal human emotions? That as adults we can feel sad, empathetic, distraught, and confused? We frequently feel the need to force ourselves to seem perfect in our children's eyes. A level of perfection, actually, that is undeniably unachievable. Children need to know that we are like them. We need to let our kids know that it's okay to not be okay right now and that so many people in the world are going through this same whirlwind of emotions.
Anytime I feel as though I'm failing at this whole "home-schooling" thing; anytime I look at the pile of laundry that desperately needs folding; anytime I feel awful about the fact that my kids are staying up until 1 AM; anytime I feel like I'm on the verge of tears, I remind myself of this one important fact: It's Okay. It's okay to not be okay and I'm not the only one feeling this way.
And that one thought...that one simple thought...reminds me that I am not alone. It makes me feel connected to others. It reminds me that, even if I may not be able to go out, I am a part of this world and we are all united from a distance. Even if I can't see people, I still have people. I have my family and my kids who I live with; I have my friends; I have my neighbors; I have the friendly grocery store workers; I have nurses and doctors that are helping in this fight to ensure we all stay safe. I have you, and you have me.
And anytime I think about how I'm not okay, I realize that most of them aren't okay, either. And I know I'm not alone.
But, I also know, that someday soon, we will be okay. We will go out to the parks and restaurants. We will swim in the ocean; the river; a pool. Our kids will be back in school, or at their art lessons or dance classes. We will be able to shake hands, kiss on the cheeks, and hug. We will definitely hug.
We will remember what it felt like to have that contact; that emotion that brings out the best in us. It's something I know I didn't realize until this started. How seeing the people I care about and love actually brings out the best in me. How being around the ones we love just makes us feel.
If you are feeling sad right now; if your mental health is declining; if you feel lost, hopeless, or confused, please reach out to someone that you love. Someone that you know can help you. A friend, family member, a doctor. Whoever it may be. Please, talk to someone. You are important.
But also, know that it's okay to not be okay. It's okay to need someone. And know that we're here. And that we're listening.
And that one day, someday soon, it will be okay.
